Funny Vintage Art

Poop in a Bucket

It's Saturday and it's the day before Easter. I have a busy day ahead of me. I am hosting Easter dinner for my side tomorrow so I have to clean bathrooms and dust and mop...then I have to take Cameron to her Dance Camp at 10 and rush to the store for a few dozen eggs to boil and cool while she's gone. Then, while the eggs are boiling, I will be stuffing plastic eggs with Candy for the Rabbit to leave in the morning. I will also be wrapping new Easter presents and stuffing baskets and ironing clothes for church in the morning. Somewhere in there, I still have to pick up a winter's worth of dog poop in the yard so we can indeed hunt for these eggs and plan a grocery list for Costco.

At 12, I pick up Cameron and watch their "performance" to Hairspray. Last week when I walked in, she ran to me and was "too tired" to go back out and finish dancing, which means, I will be hiding inconspicuously somewhere so she can't see me and will actually perform and make it worth my time and $25 to get her there.

We will them proceed to get lunch and run to Costco where every other mad woman and man will be planning for Easter. This of course, will be right during Tucker's nap time, so I'm banking on it not being a very peaceful browse through the book tables (which is the main reason I go to Costco in the first place).

I will then come home, try to get the dog poop finished up because really, how much can one dog poop in a winter? Would you like to see for yourself? Come look in my yard! I started on it the other day and the kids are fascinated with the sight of poop in a bucket. I had a trail of two of my own and two neighbor kids following behind like ducks in a row. Every time I would scoop and toss, they would all proceed to yell "Ewwwww!!!" and then get real close to the bucket and say how stinky it was. This is cheap afternoon entertainment for all neighborhood children. I'm not sure if that makes me the cool mom or the weird mom who puts poop in a bucket, but I guess I'll have to embrace this until they are all old enough to hand them a shovel and a bucket and say, "Ya wanna play in my yard, kid? Then grab a shovel and show me some poop!"

Oprah on Motherhood

Last night I was trying not to puke (I am not pregnant, just have the flu that that the kids have had) and thanking God that I was not pregnant again. I was also catching up on some TiVo'd shows, as Matt took the kids and dealt with bedtime so I could go rest. It was faaabulous. I should "get the flu" more often.... Anyways, back to the shows. I had tivo'd Oprah's Secret Life of Mom's show that aired Monday.

First of all, I love how Oprah thinks that she knows what it's like to be a Mom, because she has all the money in the world and a few dogs. And she has watched Gayle (her bff) be a mom. But anyways, she had all of these confessions of mothers about what they do to "get through". I realize, I am not the only one who feels like I never get ahead. Like my kids have sucked me dry of any intellect. Like I am never going to look attractive or take more than 30 minutes to do my hair and makeup again...not even on a holiday or for some other special occasion. I could truly relate to the moms who said they have left their kids to scream in their cribs while they sit on the couch and drink wine. I've been there, I know EXACTLY what they're talking about. But what I did not agree with is the fact that not one mother on that show said anything positive about being a Mom! Not one! The negative is few and far between the rewarding moments and I was really frusterated that they didn't mention that!

Motherhood is hard, but there are ways to make it pleasant. Bitching on a blog about getting puked on is just one of those ways. There are also outlets such as playgroup and/or other groups of mom's in which you realize that you are not alone. And also, there is always the reward of getting through the day when your daughter is finally in bed and she calls you in one more time and you're ready to scream because she has water, the closet door is closed, she has her animals, she's gone pee, what could she POSSIBLY want, but to tell you that she loves you. It's all worth it. And if none of that works, a $5 bottle of wine will really help take the edge off your day while cooking dinner.

My little scrapbooker

I finally figured out how to use up all of my impulse buy scrapbook paper that I have lost interest in, or just need to get rid of, because i know I"ll never use it. Cameron! Lately, when I scrapbook, she sits beside me and makes "scrapbooks", which are usually smaller than 1X1 pieces of confetti. She is also good at watercoloring cardboard boxes to keep her "Scrapbooks" in. I'm not sure if she's going to be detail oriented, because at this point, it's kind of a mad crazed confetti haze behind me, but hey, she's using up paper, I don't have to feel guilty by throwing it out, and she's quiet...except for the incessant questions of 3 and a 1/2 year olds...such as........

"Mom, why did Dumbo fly down in that bag in the sky?" (hmmmm....)
"Mom, what week are we going to use these stickers?" (whenever I get to them)
"Mom, is it a "play outside" day?" (not if I have go get out of this chair)
"Mom, what are you doing?" (wondering how long until I can get away with a glass of wine)
"Mom, will the window break if I hit it with scissors?" (Hmmmmm.....good question)
"Mom, can we go swimming?" (It's April)
"Mom, I have a special delivery for you.....what's a special delivery?" (Wait, now I'm confused)
"Mom, can I buy a happy meal with Dad tomorrow?"
"Mom, why is Hello Kitty not Cinderella?"

So yes, Cameron and I love scrapbook time....although for some reason, I always have a headache when we're finished. I'll have to post some pictures of her work.

Lady Antebellum

I've been hearing this song on the radio a lot lately and it just says so much. I really think this is well written. OH, and Lady Antebellum is a great group!

I run from hate

I run from prejudice

I run from pessimists

But I run too lateI run my life

Or is it running me

Run from my past

I run too fast

Or too slow it seems

When lies become the truth

That’s when I run to you

Chorus

This world keeps spinning faster

Into a new disaster

so I run to youI run to you baby

And when it all starts coming undone

Baby you’re the only one I run to

I run to you

We run on fumes

Your life and mine

Like the sands of time

Slippin’ right on throughA

nd our love’s the only truth

That’s why I run to you

Repeat Chorus X 2

SICK KIDS SUCK

I hate it when my kids are sick. If there is one thing that can lead to me feeling incompetent as a mother, it's having a sick kid or two. Do you take them to the doctor or do you let it run it's course? Do you force them to eat or let them starve because they don't want anything. How high is too high for a fever.

Cameron has been sick for three days. She had class pictures at preschool yesterday and I brought her to be in the group shot. Even her hair was sick because I curled and curled and curled with the curling iron and by the time we got there it was stuck to the side of her head...again. She looked like walking death, but she's in the shot! Maybe it's my obsession with my scrapbook that made me force a pair of tights on her and rush her out the door. Poor kid.

So far Tucker doesn't have it, but I can see he's thinking about it by the look in his eye. I am afraid to shower because every time I do, she pukes on me again. Sometimes it's best to just go with the puke flow and live in it.

Anyways, that's my rant for the day. I was supposed to hit the outlet malls with my sister, but it looks like it'll be another day on the couch for us. Oh well, I've been wanting to check out this site that everybody's talking about...twitter.com? Heard of it?

Lazy Saturdays

I love when Cameron spends the night at Grandma and Grandpa's house. Yesterday my mom picked up both kids at noon and I went to Archiver's for a much needed afternoon off. I took a class titled "Watercolor Whimsy" where I learned the fine art of watercolor pencils on stamped images. It was pretty fun. I also went to the Swim and Run Shop to attempt to find a suit to fit my post-baby body. It was frusterating and I left with nothing.

When I got home Matt and I enjoyed each other's company "alone" and then went to La Costa for dinner. No kids, no messes, no needs. It was a nice break. Cameron has not had any interest in coming home and they are at my brother's baseball game. I have been enjoying an easy morning. Tucker and I walked to the shop (0ver a mile) and visited with Matt who was working on the backhoe for a side project. Then we hitched a ride home from him, (because walking all the way back home would have been too much exercise), made lunch and now I am getting ready to finally put together Tucker's first year album and Cameron's 3rd year album. I am making some great headway on them! Here are some of my pages that I have recently finished: